True Story











{March 23, 2010}   Spring Break

True Story:  Been there. Done that.

Oh, spring break… Where do you start? I guess from the beginning…. And since there are so many to bore you with, I am going to break this up into more than 1 post… Your Welcome. 

I don’t know what year of my life the spring break memories begin. There are so many jumbled, beach trips that stick out randomly in my mind. So I will just start as far back as I can go.

Spring break elementary school:  No memories. I’ve killed too many brain cells.

Oh wait… There’s 1. The court case:

My brother is 6 1/2 years older than me, so I don’t have a lot of spring break memories with him as he was graduating highschool when I was beginning middle school. But there is 1 that sticks out vividly in my mind.

We went to Aspen, CO, with my dad and his girlfriend, just my brother & I. We are his only kids that we know of. When I speak of my little sisters, they are my “Sistas from another Mista”. This statement mortifies my mother when we say it in public… We love to say it in public.

My brother’s birthday is in March and usually fell somewhere around Spring Break. I always wanted to do cool things for his b’day like go to Chucky Cheese or something awesome like that. He would get pissed and say I got my way because I was the favorite… And so on and so forth, you all know the drill.

Well, Dad and his lady friend go out for dinner minus 2 obnoxious kids one night, this particular Spring Break in Aspen, circa 1983. My brother is in charge of me. Wrong words to give him licence with.

Here’s how it went down. He wouldn’t let me out of my chair in the hotel room the whole time Dad was gone. I had to sit with my back straight and arms on the arm rests for hours. If I tried to get up he would shove me back down in the chair. And … Wouldn’t let me pee.

What would you do? ? ? 

I screamed my ass off.

Until the hotel manager came to the room and knocked on the door. Where my brother proceeded to tell me to sit tight & shut up while he talked to him.

I’m not really sure why he wanted me to sit still. I think he wanted to watch TV and not me, if memory serves.

Long story short, when Dad got home and we all began screaming to tell our side of the story, hotel manager included. We were all told to shut up. Then Dad proceeded to hold court, nominating himself Judge, of course. (Probably been partaking in the adult bevs).

Sentencing: 

Me:  To bed for disturbing the Peace.

P:  To bed for assault/child abuse, or something along those lines.

Hmm, What else happened in Aspen?

1) I had NO FEAR. I was somewhere between 6 -8 and wanted to quit ski school on day 2 because… Pff… “I got this”. I would go to the top of whatever black diamond dad and P were doing and just sit down on the back of my skis and go! (Was still too young for poles).

2) I got sunburns on my eyes and they had to hog-tie me to get eye drops in them. But I did get a cool pair of pink sunglasses with leather side panels to block the sun. Ironically, I am addicted to eye drops today.

3) I hurt my knee  (going for it) and had to ride in ski patrol and wear a leg brace. I remember the rest of my party thinking I was fake limping down the cobblestone streets of Aspen. Not true. It REALLY hurt.

4) I ate escargot for the first time in the Crystal Palace, and saw dinner theater for the first time in my life. LOVED it.

Spring Break junior high. Now, we’re getting somewhere.

To be continued…

True Story:  My bro in law has a lot of letters behind his name. We are all convinced he continues to go to school for Spring Break. I think he’s had like 13, post High School.

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Lori says:

Ashley,
I listened to the song, “If I had a million dollars,” today on the way to B’ham…and there was no talk of go carts, lol. Too funny!!



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