True Story:  My husband had an affair with a Vampire.

That’s right. A real life Vampire. I have mentioned this female version of half-life in previous posts. But didn’t want to blog about it right off the bat, because this is a humor blog. And although, infidelity is hilarious, I didn’t want my blog to be a bitch fest.

True Story:  In light of recent events, it may become one…

Naaaa… If  anything has saved me in my troubled times, it has been my sense of humor. I don’t plan on giving up on that now.

I call her a Vampire for these simple (self-explanatory if you know her) reasons:

1)  She’s pale. Seriously.

2)  She walked among us without revealing her true nature.

3)  She slipped in my house in the dark while I was sleeping to be with my husband, and hid this in the daylight.

She was my friend AND colleague. Yes. You don’t have to say it. I have re-evaluated my choices in friends.

True Story:  When I started this post, over a week ago in honor of my 4th wedding anniversary, the title of it made sense. My marriage survived the affair, and we were patching it up. Despite stressful times we appeared to be stronger than ever.

In the last few days, Pump has decided to give up on our marriage. 

True Story:  The flowers have been ripped out of the ground like weeds.

Don’t fret. The chaos of my ever-changing true life stories will continue…